vol. 50: quiet time

+ muffins and knafeh

My meditation/yoga teacher, Pat, recently asked in class: “What question does your life ask of you today?” She framed it as a question not just to be asked in that particular moment, but every day. It’s the kind of question that takes a lot of quiet to even begin to answer. Inner quiet, or what the Germans call Innigkeit.

Perhaps it’s partially for that reason that I’ve felt less like posting over the past couple of months. It is nice to foster quietude in a particularly noisy internet landscape. While I’ve always enjoyed creating and sharing for social media (perhaps that’s why I’m a performing artist), I love the idea of a world that lessens its output in these ways. What if social media was only a space for art? Hmm.

Yesterday I coached a young singer on some Mahler songs she’s preparing for her final master’s recital. These included an arrangement of “Ich bin der Welt abhanden gekommen,” a colossal song with poetry by Friedrich Rückert (the pianist laughed when I said “Oh my god” upon turning the page to find this piece). I worked with the singer and her trio (she’s doing an arrangement with piano and cello) to find the existential, contemplative nature of this song that seems to unfold spontaneously as the piece meanders through different harmonic and textural worlds. How cool to have songs that explore the human condition in these ways.

I am lost to the world
With which I used to waste much time;
It has for so long known nothing of me,
It may well believe that I am dead.
Nor am I at all concerned
If it should think that I am dead.
Nor can I deny it,
For truly I am dead to the world.
I am dead to the world’s tumult
And rest in a quiet realm!
I live alone in my heaven,
In my love, in my song!
-Rückert, trans. Richard Stokes

Last night my partner and I finally watched Chloe Zhao’s Hamnet. I had such a nice time entering into the world of 16th-century England in an often quiet film that relies largely on visual storytelling. It made me think about earlier ages when we didn’t have phones etc. I don’t think our lives then were any better or worse than our lives now because of these phones (certainly quality of life has improved because of science and healthcare and electricity and a whole host of other developments), as life still seemed pretty hard back then! Works of art set in different eras remind us how human nature remains consistent, despite shifts in culture and technology. I digress.

dreamy couple alert

Tomorrow I’m planning on trying this lovely recipe from Chi Nguyễn. Last week I made a delicious blueberry olive oil cake with chia seeds etc. from Alison Roman’s newsletter. I brought some for my friend who works down the hall from me and a saxophone prof has been badgering me about gluten free treats since, so I’m going to try making these muffins gluten free (any excuse to incorporate some almond flour is ok by me). Will report back.

+A couple of weeks ago, I tried my hand at making Palestinian Knafeh for a little food club we’ve established with friends here in the Peg. We had to scour the city for Kataifi dough and I used mozzarella cheese for the filling (+ homemade syrup + lightly roasted pistachios) rather than authentic middle eastern cheese but it was delicious nonetheless. I consulted quite a few recipes but these two were perhaps the most helpful. :)

photo taken with my tiny camera.

PS: Doing a few fun performances coming up in Toronto at which I’d love to see some friendly faces. The first is some gorgeous Mendelssohn and Schubert with the Toronto Beach Chorale and a local orchestra on Feb 22nd. The second is an exciting reprise of a recital Isabelle David and I gave a couple of years ago narrated by the wonderful Robin Elliott for Koffler Arts. Feeling so happy to work on this rich and beautiful music.